about me

Practically imperfect in every way. Start with a lot of silliness. Mix in some insecurities and a handful of awkwardness. Add a pound of naivety, innocence, and child-like wonderings. Blend well. Half-bake and top off with a sprinkle of imagination and dollop of dreams. It’s the recipe for me!

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just play

quote of the day

  • "Moral of the story: Do not look at the gap. The gap is the mind-killer. Remember how Wile E. Coyote never fell down until he saw the chasm? It’s just like that." --Taylor "Tei" Lindstrom, Rogue Ink

dumbass quote

  • "I think we have come to find out that the Education system, run by Liberal Hippies that really couldn't find any other job that allowed them so much time off, the ability to do drugs, and to spout their rhetoric is alive and well. It is teaching out kids things like 'Abortion is Good,' 'Government is Bad.' We have educators that, for the most part, don't teach to the subject, they teach to their beliefs. It is really sad, and even sadder when you see highly intelligent children buying into it." --Kelli

kids say...

  • Jacob: "I need to operate on my frog, but first he needs some amnesia."

copyright

Copyright © 2004-2004 Kerrie Lee. All rights reserved.

Return to the Theatre?

July 9, 2004

When I was in high school, I was an active member of the Drama Club. I loved play-acting since I was a child, and the Drama Club gave me a place to do that with other people. I was involved in the community theatre a bit too. I loved acting. I took a character someone else created and gave it life. But I was always interpreting the work of someone else. I was acting.

In 1998, I found Dragon’s Gate. I created characters that were my own. I found that I wasn’t acting anymore. I was starting to see through these characters. Their actions were up to me. There was no script. There was no predetermined outcome. I had to play these characters. Although it was from behind the computer, I felt that my ability to perform had improved.

A few years ago, I took a course in college called Interpretive Reading. It was more than acting. It was more like the playing I was doing in my game, but with a script and in front of an audience. It was around this same time that I rolled a new character in my game. With this new character, I suddenly found myself being able to see everything as if I was the character. Movies, plays, stories… I could find pieces from each of these that related to my character. This weird combination of seeing everything through my character, and being forced to perform in front of the class changed my performances. I found myself no longer playing, but being these characters.

I became completely enthralled with the concept of being someone else. It had nothing to do with being dissatisfied with my own life, but everything to do with just experiencing life in so many different ways. It’s very hard for me to explain it, and probably even harder for you to understand it unless you’ve experienced it yourself. People could ask questions of my characters about their history or upbringing. Without having written those things out, I was able to create the answers out of thin air. But I wasn’t creating them. It was as if the answers already existed, and my character knew even if I didn’t. They were answering because they knew. I know how crazy this all sounds, but it’s truly exhilarating. I imagine it’s how a lot of professional actors feel. And I can understand when they say that performing certain scenes are emotionally exhausting for them.

I’ve lost interest in my game the past few months, and the reason is becoming clear. I stopped playing those characters that were full of life. This past week I’ve found myself connecting with another character. Part of me is holding back because I know the character is a temporary. But part of me is reveling in the experience I’ve missed for so long. The character seemed so dull and uninteresting until I was able to get into its head.

I’m considering a return to our community theatre. With this new way of becoming another person, I think I could have a lot of fun. Then again, I’m not sure I could go back to reading a script. Plus, being someone different without the confinement of a body allows for a lot of flexibility, so maybe I’ll just hang out here for a while.

CATEGORY: Uncategorized

4 Responses to “Return to the Theatre?”

  1. robert d Says:
    July 9th, 2004 at 4:10 pm

    Much magick for a little fish. Or is it like in the bible, much fish for a little magick?

    “d”

  2. Oz Says:
    July 10th, 2004 at 2:13 pm

    I know what you mean about having a character take on a life of its own. I have never acted before, but I consider myself a writer, and I’ve written several book length novels (none published–didn’t try, that wasn’t the point). I share these “books” (I feel silly calling them books, which they are–I don’t know why) with friends and family, and then we talk about what they thought. Often they ask about the characters lives outside of the story, and I can answer always answer the questions with almost no thought because I know the characters so well.

  3. Whimsy Chick Says:
    July 10th, 2004 at 2:19 pm

    Yes! That’s exactly what I mean! Have you experienced this: You have an idea where you want your character to go, but as the story unfolds, you find that your character has other plans and the story goes somewhere different? I think the unexpected turn of events my characters choose for themselves is part of the appeal to me.

  4. Oz Says:
    July 10th, 2004 at 10:53 pm

    I haven’t had that happen exactly. Let’s see, I start out with a vague outline, like: Girl from small town meets true love, then after a short time, they go in different directions, and even though they’re meant for each other, they never get back together. So that is very, VERY skimpy and can describe the plot of countless novels, plays, movies, etc. So then I write in a linear fashion, starting at the beginning, in this case, girl from smalltown. So I start to imagine the town and the girl and her family, etc. etc. etc. It’s almost a trance-like state where my mind is open to anything as long as it can fall in line with the other parts of the outline. In this state, lots and lots of things happen that I could not have predicted beforehand–mostly because I had made a point NOT to predict anything beforehand. Since my first outline was so vague–and so intrinsic to the direction of the overall story–I never have a character do something out of line with that. But oftentimes, I’ll finish writing, and my character has ended up going somewhere, doing something, meeting someone that had never entered my mind before.

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about this blog

It’s the spark of an idea that hits me unexpectedly. It’s the silly wonderings I have after a whirlwind of thoughts. It’s about creativity, inspiration, and imagination. But sometimes, it’s just about eating noodles.

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