I have a difficult time seeing past the surface of things and reading into their true meaing. As an art major, I was expected to participate in discussions of student art in our studio classes, and to recognize and analyze patterns in my art history classes. It wasn’t until my final art history class that I began to understand how to interpret and talk about art. Unfortunately, it was the last class I took before graduating. Talking about art is still very difficult for me, but there was a time when I had a glimmer of understanding. I wish I could say the same for literature.

When it comes to literature (and poetry), I just don’t get it. I like to read, but my literature classes always made me feel bad. I always felt like I was missing something that was perfectly obvious to everyone else. It made me fearful of reading classic literature.

It’s this fear that’s made it difficult for me to declare a desire to read classic literature. What if I read something, but don’t really understand the true meaning? I’ve decided to take the pressure off myself and read for the sake of reading. People are allowed to enjoy art or music without thinking about them, so I’m taking that stance on literature. I think I could enjoy a lot of these stories, even without understanding them fully.

I searched my own bookshelves first and was surprised to find so many unread stories. I just read “The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde” for the first time ever. I didn’t even know I owned it! I have a collection of Edgar Allan Poe’s work which I will of course not understand, but which I have added to my reading list. I also found an old book from one of my literature classes which is filled with over a hundred short stories. I think I’ll try to force myself to read some of the books I dreaded/loathed in high school too, since they’re probably still on one of my shelves here somewhere.

This is the first time I’ve been excited to read classics. And if I don’t end up making the connection between Napoleon the Pig and Stalin? Oh well.

I’m still working on plans for a small chicken coop in my parents’ yard. We can’t have chickens here in our neighborhood, but of course, if we end up moving, that will change. Ideally, I’d like a nice big chunk of land for a hobby farm. I’m thinking chickens, ducks, a goat, and maybe some bees. I guess it’s these thoughts that make the possibility of leaving Michigan more bearable.

I’ve narrowed down the breed I’d like to get, and I’ll probably get a few more than we originally planned for. I’m thinking 8-10 now. Unfortunately, it doesn’t look like we can order such a small quantity, so we’ll have to either order with someone else, or find a local place that sells them individually.

Rob hasn’t really warmed up to the idea of having chickens yet. I keep getting the feeling he’s staying quiet about it in hopes that I’ll forget about it. My thought is, if he didn’t want craziness in his life, he shouldn’t have married a crazy person! In reality, I expect he’ll come around about the chickens right after they start laying. He’ll turn into Mr. Chicken Farmer bragging about the greatness our fresh brown eggs to everyone.

Michigan’s unemployment rate is one of the worst in the nation right now. It’s never really concerned me much, since Rob doesn’t work for the auto industry. His job is safe. Or so we thought.

There’s been buzz about a change coming soon. We’ve talked about what could happen, and what was likely to happen. Today, an announcement was made.

ABN Amro sells U.S. Mortgage Group

I’m not an alarmist, so I can’t say what this means for us yet. But the possibility of a move out of state just got bigger. I’d prefer to stay where we are of course, but the “other state” doesn’t look too bad.

Then again, maybe this could be an opportunity for us to do something crazy and unexpected.

We took the boys to a rollerskating party hosted by their old school on Thursday night. I was a little surprised that I was able to rollerskate as well as I did after so many years of unpractice. I commented to Rob that my first rollerskating party was at that very same rink nearly thirty years ago, and that not much about it had changed. It was a funny coincidence that the dj started playing an old disco song just as I finished the comment. Apparently, the music hadn’t changed much in those thirty years either.

When we made the decision to try homeschooling mid-year, I was concerned that the boys would be reluctant to leave their friends. It wasn’t until their last few days that Jacob mentioned he would miss a few of his friends, though he was still very eager to start homeschooling. I’ve also become aware that some of their friends did not react well to the news that my boys would not be returning to school after Thanksgiving.

We’ve been pleasantly surprised by invitations from their old school friends several times since we left. I’m impressed with the parents who have taken the time to find a way to contact us. I also feel proud that my boys were the kind of friends who made a lasting impression on so many other kids.

I’ve been very grouchy these past three days. There are a couple things creating a bit of stress for our family right now, and the weather since Thursday hasn’t helped to lift the mood. I’m longing for the sun. I need color and light.

I decided to search my photo archives for something to liven up my site, and came across my collection of sunsets and sunrises. The picture I chose for my current header was taken on December 17, 2004 while waiting with the boys outside for the school bus. It was a very brisk day and we had just enough snow to cover the ground. It’s quite a contrast to this winter’s weather. In October, there were a few scattered snowfalls, but by the time December rolled around, we had nothing. Nearly a full week into January, and we’ve gotten neither snow nor our annual ice storm. When it does precipitate, we get rain–cold, grey rain.

I happen to love clouds. Their color, their texture, even their precipitation. But there needs to be some balance. All clouds and no sun makes for a gloomy day. And a gloomy me. We’re supposed to get some sun tomorrow. I just need enough to clear the fog around my head. For now, the new header on the site will have to do.

I’ve been putting off making any resolutions for the New Year, not because I don’t want to make changes to improve my life, but because January 1 just feels too random to me. I know the idea is “a new year, a new beginning” or whatever (though it seems more like new beginnings should happen in the spring). But really, January 1 is just another day.

I’m impatient. If I want to make improvements, I go ahead and make them. I can’t wait until 01-01. Also, I feel like my improvements should be allowed to happen gradually and without a timeline. Waiting until the start of the new year puts too much pressure on me to complete all my goals during that year.

However, in the spirit of the New Year, I have given some thought to the things I have already been doing to improve my life, and that I would like to continue working on into 2007. I have also listed a few things I would like to do within the confines of 2007. You may notice my trend this year is about nature, simplicity, and the pursuit of happiness.

Nutrition

1. Continue daily smoothies.
2. Continue tuna and walnuts.
3. Continue supplementing greens.
4. Increase real greens.
5. Increase whole grains.

Health and Fitness

1. Re-evaluate current formal exercise program.
2. Continue daily stretching routine.
3. Improve flexibility in my back.
4. Increase nature+fitness. (walking, biking)
5. Increase holistic wellness.

Getting Back to Nature

1. Record observations in my nature journal once (or more) weekly.
2. Build a chicken coop and raise 4-6 laying hens.
3. Continue research on keeping honey bees.
4. Spend more time in the woods alone.

The Arts

1. Find a way to make pottery again.
2. Get recommendations for classic literature. Then read.
3. Learn to play the guitar.
4. Continue my French lessons.
5. Find and join a theatre group.
6. Consider voice lessons.

Other

1. Take more photos.
2. Write a quarterly family newsletter.
3. Build a homeschooling curriculum that meets our needs.
4. Re-evaluate my business and determine which elements support my pursuit of happiness.
5. Find an organization that appeals to me and become a volunteer.